My beautiful friend Tifffany Peterson recently posted a meme that said, “You can’t have million dollar goals on a $10 self care budget.” Wow how much that resonated with me. I remember if someone asked me to donate money to an organization I would jump without hesitating. If someone needed help with something I would drop everything. If a person needed anything for their life, I had no problem saying yes. However; if there was something I wanted for me that was such an easy and immediate no. And I never felt bad about it. I love service. I love giving back. It fills my heart to give something to someone that has nothing because I have realised I receive way more than I give. (We will talk about that in another post). Some of the happiest moments of my life have been on humanitarian trips around the world. And that my dears will never change.
However what has changed is me.
All the years of coaching, personal development, plant medicine, therapy, yoga, meditation, and letting go of the old me have shifted the old story of what I did or didn’t deserve to an easy yes on self care for me. I know what I deserve, and now it flows to me and through me so easily. Oh the healing. The days and nights of tears; which now when they come up I don’t stuff and just allow to flow through my body. Flow and feel the emotions so deeply until my body lets them go and they are released. Released from my body, physically at a cellular level. And that’s the magic✨
A year and a half ago I took my first delta One flight (paid for by someone else); and my life was changed. The level of care, attention and intentional details allowed my body to fully relax and melt into the experience. Since then it is my preferred option, and always will be. Taking a delta One flight two days ago just reminded me of this experience, and also how I felt before this.
I’m not sharing that delta One is my fav to boast, AND I’m not going to stop sharing, or hide my life behind a closed door to make anybody else feel comfortable. I did that for so many years, I minimized moments that lit me up, or experiences I had that made my body feel yummy and juicy. Only because I didn’t want to make anyone feel bad. Now I know that I am responsible for myself and that if anything I say triggers, or brings up an emotional response in yourself I would ask you to get curious. Ask yourself why it feels like that. If you are willing to be honest with yourself, get curious and go deeper until you can figure out why; you will get some major answers that shift your life.
Speaking of being honest with yourself I’m going to be completely honest and share how I used to feel when I saw people post about things I didn’t have. I couldn’t believe people would post stories of a designer purse when there are children starving all over the world. I was triggered. I remember seeing others have things that secretly I dreamed of (but didn’t have the awareness to know), and would feel confused why everybody wasn’t taking care of everybody else. It was only until I did the deep work that I recognized what my triggers were and WHY I had such a huge emotional response about it. For me it was because deep down, on a subconscious level, I didn’t think I deserved it. So my mindset when I saw that and felt triggered was that someone else was selfish for having it. (I know I know, some of you won’t appreciate my brutal honesty, but those that do carry on.) I couldn’t process that they maybe just knew their worth.
So, I promise I’m not here to shame you. But to truly honor you and your emotions wherever you are in your journey. Because emotions are beautiful teachers. They can help us understand and teach us about the life that we want. ONLY IF we are willing to get curious. If we are triggered and stuff it down we will not be able to learn WHY. If we are triggered and ignore it we won’t be able to make a change. So I ask you. If what you are doing is working; carry on. And if there’s any inkling inside of you that you have the desire for more in your life, or even remotely want something different; please reach out. I’m here as a to assist you in getting EVERYTHING your heart desires. Because you deserve it. And if you feel stuck, or unable to even get clarity on what that is, we can start there. Creating clarity on what your authentic self wants. Not what other people want for you, not your family, your church, your school, your programming. What you want.
I’m here for you. I see you. I honor you on your journey. Let’s make magic together ✨
Thank you to at delta for being my favorite airline always. Like I always say, delta diamond is a girls best friend http://www.delta.com 💎